


blessed by you

by metalhawk



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One)
Genre: I wrote the things leading up to it so watch out folks!!, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, May Be Graphic, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Harm, be careful guys!! I don’t want anyone to get hurt by reading this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-25
Updated: 2018-06-25
Packaged: 2019-05-28 06:18:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15042614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/metalhawk/pseuds/metalhawk
Summary: Starscream can’t get rid of Megatron. Wheeljack just wants to help.





	blessed by you

_His wings scrape against the back wall of his hab suite, trying desperately to back away from the towering warlord that had entered his quarters only moments ago._

Starscream’s denta clench in his recharge, squirming against the berth as he pushes upwards, helm smacking against the wall. 

_“No, no, please...” Starscream whines, staring down at the ground as Megatron comes to a stop before the seeker. “My infidelity...you needn’t worry anymore.” He says, shaking._

“Please,” Starscream croaks, pushing against the wall behind him with his helm in his recharge, finding it to be ever unrelenting. “No.”

_“Oh, no, Starscream,” Megatron smirks, his sharpened fangs glistening. He wrenches the seeker’s helm upwards, staring into his optics. “Your empty promises cannot save you tonight.”_

Starscream shudders, one clawed servo scratching frantically at his neck and chin, trying to erase the feeling of the servo that had been there. His talon catches on a small fuel line, and warm Energon coats his finger. His denta remain clenched, a soft whimper escaping them. 

_Megatron’s servos are not gentle as they map out the seeker’s body, his own claws catching on delicate seams and exposed wires. His rough servos grip Starscream by the wings to slam him back down into the wall, drawing a cry from the jet._

The seeker’s wings thrash against the berth slab and the wall, twitching angrily in a desperate attempt of escape. 

_Megatron’s talons dug under the plating of Starscream’s thighs, prying his legs open and forcing himself between Starscream’s legs. “Please.” The broken words escape the seeker’s vocalizer, panic rising deep in his chassis as he tries to writhe away._

Starscream throws himself back against the wall, his servo flying out and swiping a few objects from his nightstand onto the floor with a clatter. He screams out, begging for his nonexistent attacker to stop touching, attacking, holding him. His berth sheets tear under his kicking pedes and scratching talons. Still, Starscream scratches at his plating, trying to rub the feelings of helplessness, fear, pain from his body. Energon drips onto his berth. 

_Megatron growls, servo coming upwards to deliver a swift blow to the seeker’s chassis, the other moving up the grip one of the vent’s on the side of his helm and denting the thin metal of the louvres, drawing only a soft whimper from the helpless seeker. Megatron’s claws dig into the underside of his wrist, nicking exposed wires as he takes both of Starscream’s servos in one hold and slams up against the wall behind them._

_“Now,” Megatron grins at his the exposed seeker. “Let us see about your punishment for disobeying me.” He says, from deep in his vocalizer. Starscream cannot stop the warlord’s servo from reaching down between his thigh and his interface to trigger the panel open._

Starscream’s optics snap on quickly as he gasps, his fans on full speed as he looks, terrified, at the room around him. Ripped sheets. Spilt Energon from various points on his body, leaking into the berth covers. A knocked over body of engex and a datapad, laying on the floor below his nightstand. 

_Not real, not real, not real, he’s gone now, he can’t hurt me, he can’t, he can’t, he can’t, he can’t—_

The thoughts race through Starscream’s processor as he sits up in his berth, swinging his legs over the side and resting his helm in his servos. He grits his teeth as he tries to will back the lubricants from his optics. 

Slowly, Starscream pulls his helm from his servos, venting shallow as he does so. He stares at one of the cuts on his thighs, a nick to one of the fuel lines below his plating. Energon dribbles down onto the berth, soaking it with purple liquid. 

Starscream can’t seem to stop himself as he drag his talons across the plating of his leg, red paint curling under his nail. They make their way up to the seam between his upper thigh and his waist, wedging one digit under and slicing at the delicate bunch of wires there. A pained moan falls from his lips as Energon runs down his leg. 

How was he ever supposed to escape the feeling of Megatron touching, using him if not to destroy his frame completely? If not to scratch the feeling off for himself?

Starscream dragged his claws up until they scratched along the glass of his cockpit, screeching against the black glass. Starscream’s lip plate pulls upward in a snarl, digging deeper and watching flakes of glass fall from his chassis. 

_He’ll always be a part of you...servos always roaming down your body and claiming you as his. You can’t escape him. You never will. Stop trying._

Starscream screams out in anguish, slashing his servo across his chassis, trying to banish the feeling of Megatron’s servos, mapping out the area over his spark chamber like it was his, trying to erase the feeling of exposure from when Megatron had punched his cockpit glass in to get to his very spark. 

He finds himself panting, lowering himself back onto the berth as tears of lubricant fall down his face. He doesn’t try to wipe them away. 

_Dirty. Used. Weak. Touched._ A piece of scrap metal to be consumed and thrown away. His body wasn’t his. He wasn’t clean or pure or deserving of anything, not in this state. Not when so many had taken him to do as they desired. The frame he had once took pride in was now full of smudges and touches of other bots, and was now fit for the junk heap. He was broken. 

Starscream lifts his servo into his line of sight, scratching down his palm with the talons of his other servo. He tilts his freshly injured servo backwards to expose the wires of his wrist beneath the plating, digging in with his fingers to tear at the wires and circuit boards beneath, drawing clumps and thick streams of Energon from it. The place where Megatron’s own servos has gripped him so many times, rendering him helpless, was now coated with bright pink Energon. Starscream let out a breathy sigh of pain and relief, optics flickering as he let his fingers trail down his forearm, leaving scratches in their wake. 

He rests his bloodied arm on his chest, and allows recharge to take him at last. 

______________________________

“Hey, Star, I brought vodka from Maccadam’s, you wanna drink some with me?” Wheeljack asked, stepping into Starscream’s lavish apartment and heading towards the kitchen. 

He sets down the bottle of Carcerian vodka down on the counter, looking over to find that Starscream wasn’t in his living quarters. Usually, when he came in after a long day, Starscream would be pacing around, staring out on Cybertron from the balcony, or tapping away at a datapad on the couch. Instead, he was nowhere to be found. 

“Starscream?” Wheeljack steps out from the kitchen, heading cautiously towards Starscream’s berthroom, where he saw himself spending more and more of his recharge cycles at, as of late. The door slid open before him, and Wheeljack’s vents sputtered and his spark stopped momentarily in his chest. 

Starscream. Energon smeared on his chest, dripping from seams. Paint curling in the midst of deep scratches. Wires peaking out from under plating, sparking and popping. Fiery red optics reduced only to the grey of offline. Laying a pool of his own Energon. 

Wheeljack’s optics fly open as he runs towards Cybertron’s unconcious leader. He falls to his knees at the edge of the berth, taking Starscream’s uninjured servo in his own. “Oh, Star, what happened to you?” 

The Energon loss wasn’t going to be enough to kill him. And Wheeljack knew that Starscream wouldn’t want any medic to see him in such a weakened state. He squeezes the cold servo, looking out of the room for forced entry or a sloppy exit—a cracked window or an unhinged balcony door. Nothing.

The scientist sat up on the berth next to the injured seeker, carefully sliding one arm under his leaking neck and one under his legs, hoisting him into Wheeljack’s embrace. “Star. Wake up, sweetspark.”

Wheeljack took the seeker’s servo once more. He slid his faceplate back, pressing the taloned digits to his face and pressing his lips against Starscream’s digits. 

Starscream’s optics booted up, dim red optics meeting Wheeljack’s blue. “ ‘Jack...”

Wheeljack lifted one servo to trail his digits down the side of Starscream’s helm, stopping at his chin and cupping his face. “Hey, Star. What...what happened?”

It seemed like a switch flipped in Starscream’s processor, no warning and no time to talk him down. His optics widened, his wings went taut, and he was scurrying out of Wheeljack’s arms faster than the scientist could stop him. His back slammed into the wall behind his berth, and he pulled his knees up close to his scratched chassis and pointed one taloned finger at Wheeljack. “Stay...stay away from me.”

Wheeljack put his servos up near his helm, optics wide. “Star...what—“

“I won’t let you.” Starscream sneered, crimson optics turned on Wheeljack. Fear. Betrayal. Panic. That was all Wheeljack could see in them. 

“Won’t let me what, sweetspark, I—“

“ _Don’t call me that!”_ Starscream’s wings were down, stressed. Wheeljack realized he felt threatened. Starscream wrapped his arms around his folded knees. 

“Starscream, what happened to you?” Wheeljack’s voice was soft as he asked the question once more, hoping the third time would yield an answer for such defensive behavior. 

“What’s it to you?” Starscream snarled at him, and it looked like he was trying to back further into the wall. Wheeljack tried to reach for his field, but it was already pulled up under his plating. “I know what you want from me. Don’t pretend like you care anymore.”

“I don’t need anythin’ from you, Star. Just tell me who hurt you.” Wheeljack’s field pushed hesitantly at the seeker’s, full of concern, confusion, and most prominent: love. 

Starscream’s scowl seemed to fall away as he whimpered, softly. He stared down at the stained sheets and his own torn body as his voice dropped to a whisper. “If you take it, will you stop acting like you care about me?”

“Star, take what? I don’t—“

Realization and alarm crashed through Wheeljack as he watched Starscream shakily unwrap his arms from his legs, and spread his bent knees further apart. 

“No. Starscream. That’s not what—“ Wheeljack said, looking up from Starscream’s knees to meet the scared optics of the seeker. 

“Don’t lie to me, Wheeljack.” Starscream looked down again. “Just take what you want, and go.”

“I don’t want that, Star.” Wheeljack shook his helm. “You’re hurtin’. You don’t want it. I could never take advantage of you like that. I want you to let me in an’ tell me what happened to you.”

“Megatron.” Starscream said, at last. “He...he was touching me. He took me...I–I didn’t want it, and he still didn’t anyway. I couldn’t get away from him. The only way was to destroy my frame.” His words hung in the silence between them. “If you did it, it wouldn’t be the first time.”

“I’m so sorry,” Wheeljack wanted nothing more than to sweep the seeker into his arms and hold him. But Starscream was so scared, so vulnerable, he didn’t want to make him feel worse. “I could never, sweetspark. Not like this. You...you have my word.”

“Of course,” Starscream scoffed. “I’m too...repulsive now, anyway. He’s touched me...so much...I—“

“Star.” Wheeljack shifts further on the berth. “Can I touch you?”

“If you must, Autobot.”

Wheeljack bites back a remark about being on a _faction basis_ now. Starscream needs _him_. Not his slagging comments. 

He puts himself on his knees in front of Starscream’s still open legs, his field reaching out with love and care and promise. He takes both of Starscream’s servos, bloodied and not, and holds them. “You’re beautiful. Everythin’ about you is gorgeous, and Primus, you’re so strong and frag if I don’t think the primes have blessed me with you. I don’t think you’re dirty, or repulsive. I think you’re someone that needs love and care just like any other bot out there. I’m willing to give that to you, Star.”

Wheeljack found himself with an armful of seeker. Bloodied, beautiful, stubborn seeker. He wrapped his arms around Starscream, his field enveloping him with protecting and love. Wheeljack carefully twisted himself around until his back was to the wall, resting Starscream against his chest. His servos found his delicate wings, and he ran his servos up and down them. Starscream shuddered against him, relaxing into Wheeljack with a sigh. 

“You can’t let Megs destroy you now. He’s gone. He’s frag all on the Lost Light. I won’t let him touch you ever again. I promise.” Wheeljack murmured into Starscream’s audial. “I love you, Starscream. You don’t have to say it back. Just...I love you.”

Starscream just curled closer. 

“Star?” Wheeljack asked the mech in his arms. 

“Hmm?” 

“We need to get you patched up.” Wheeljack said, pulling away from Starscream. 

“ ‘M fine.” Starscream murmured.

“I’m going to get a medical kit.”

Starscream let out a small whine, sitting up on the berth. “Take me with you.”

“I’ll just be gone for a sec, Star.”

“It only took me a ‘sec’ to do this.” Starscream gestured at himself, optics narrowing. Wheeljack could still see the underlying vulnerability. “I...don’t want to be alone. Not now.”

“C’mere,” Wheeljack mumbled after a second, scooping Starscream into his arms. He walked out into the kitchen of the apartment, setting Starscream down on the counter as he went to grab a medical kit from one of the cabinets. 

Starscream’s optics trailed to the bottle of vodka beside him. He picked it up, examining the dark black glass and the magenta label. “Carcerian,” his face flickered into a scowl as he thought of Elita One. “How...romantic.”

“Yeah, I picked it up from Maccadam’s. I was gonna share it with you. And then, you know.”

“And then you found me in a dramatically needy mess on my berth.” Starscream rolled his optics. “That’s just so incredible, isn’t it?”

“No, I found you in need of help,” Wheeljack turned back to the seeker sitting on the counter. “You’re hurtin’, Star. Cut yourself some slack. You’ve been through the pit and back.”

“I’m supposed to be strong. I’m the leader of Cybertron.” Starscream sighs. “Megatron isn’t even here. But here I am, destroying myself for him. Just what he would’ve wanted. Pathetic.”

“Somethin’ happened to you, Starscream. Let yourself heal. Even leaders can be weak. That’s just part of coming out of a four million year war.” Wheeljack took Starscream’s servo. “I would know. I tore myself up about what happened to my face for months. Still, I hardly ever show it to people. We all have scars, Star.”

“And yet you show yourself to me.”

Wheeljack popped open the medical kit, taking a welding gun from the case. He wedges his torso in between Starscream’s legs, and presses a kiss to the scratch over his cockpit glass. “Because you’re worth showin’ that kind of thing to, sweetspark. Now, lets get the worst parts over with, huh?”

Wheeljack wipes away at the nicked line of Starscream’s neck, reaching into the crevices of his chassis and upper plating to clean out any dried Energon. 

“Helm back. It’ll only be a second, gorgeous.” Wheeljack said, switching on the gun. Starscream cringed, anticipating the sting of the welding gun on his neck. 

He worked at the wires, welding them back into shape as Starscream hissed through clenched teeth. He hikes up Starscream’s thigh, seaming together the wires and fuel lines in his thigh and at his waist. 

“Worst part’ll be over soon, babe.” Wheeljack mumbled, cradling Starscream’s injured wrist in his servo. Most of the Energon was dried up by now, but it was still leaking in some places. He wiped at the broken wires, letting Starscream’s free servo dig underneath Wheeljack’s shoulder plating as he did so. 

He gave no warning as he pushed the flame of the welding gun to Starscream’s wrist. Starscream cried out, talons digging in further under the scientist’s shoulder. Wheeljack bit his golossa to keep from making any sounds as he welded together the worst of the damage. 

Before Wheeljack could stop him, Starscream removed his servo from Wheeljack’s shoulder and had popped open the bottle of Carcerian vodka with his denta, then proceeded to chug it down to keep from crying out any more. 

When the last of the wires had been melded together, Wheeljack didn’t wait for Starscream drink down the rest of the bottle before taking it from the seeker’s servos and placing it on the counter beside them. 

“Well, that certainly wasn’t the best way of handling that.” Wheeljack deadpanned. 

“Yes, but it was a _way._ ” Starscream gifted Wheeljack with a smirk, flashing his glistening denta. “Plus, I have a habit of making things worse for myself.”

Wheeljack only sighed before grabbing the cleaning alcohol and rag, dipping it into the bottle and applying it to each of Starscream’s self-inflicted scratches. 

“Wheeljack?” Starscream asked, making the scientist look up from where he was working, cleaning the scratch on Starscream’s thigh. 

“Yeah, Sta—”

He didn’t have time to finish before Starscream had bent down to capture his lips in a kiss. 

Talons that injured so many, even Starscream himself, became gentle as they touched Wheeljack’s face. They rested on both sides of his helm as he leaned forward to deepen the kiss. Wheeljack only rested his servos down on Starscream’s waist, pulling him closer. 

When Starscream pulled back, he stared into Wheeljack’s optics with a glimmer Wheeljack was sure he’d never seen before. His field was filled with care, trust, and the briefest hint of hesitance. Wheeljack tugged him slightly closer against his chassis and whatever hesitance he had was washed away easily. 

Starscream dragged a digit over Wheeljack’s lips, kissing him once more. 

“I love you, too, Wheeljack.”


End file.
